Ouch that hurt

10 months and counting since we broke up. You worked through it slowly and haven't been with anyone me I've been with 3 guys had ups and downs with them all but never came to the realization that sooner or later you wouldn't be mine anymore you would soon belong to someone else and I would become that distant memory.

My ex and I are great friends since the mutual break up we have been nothing but talking every second day, hanging out on weekends, he even paid for me to fly down and visit some old friends because at the time I was in a rough patch. He is a great guy anyone would be lucky to end up with him. Respectful, cruisy, will do anything anything to make you happy and for some reason I only realized on Saturday night that all this wasn't going to be mine forever.

2 weeks ago we were out and a mutual friend of ours brought another girl friend "K". The night was awesome and K and my ex spoke most of the night. My ex mentioned that she and I didn't really chat and did try to have a chat with her but she turned the other way and whispered to another friend instead of including me in the conversations so I left it. Didn't think I'd really see her again and may ex can come across as very flirtatious and caring because he is but he means it in no harmly manner and sometimes it can be read very wrong.

Saturday night arrives the gang is heading out. All dolled up heels, hair the dress and make up done. My ex and I go together meet everyone there and then "K" arrives. She ignores me at first and doesn't say hi and later during the night we get left together so I begin conversation. What does she do for work, what school she went to, how old she is, is she single.... And then I mention that I realize she is interested in my ex and for her not to let me get in the way of her making any moves. Her response was that she did feel uncomfortable about me and my ex's friendship and wasn't sure what to do. I said he is a great guy and we have the best friendship and blah blah blah... Next I know the whole night she is sitting on his lap exchanging phone numbers, we end up all at her house later and not that they were kissing in front of me but it all just hit me. He isn't mine anymore and whether it's her or someone else soon I will be a distant memory and in most cases the friendship I have with him won't be existent. He will attend her 21st and hang with her friends and his of course but me being the threat will begin to not be included in these types of events.

We were planning over seas trips, moving out again with another friend, parties and festivals and now things will begin to change and I won't be a priority anymore and it all just hit me now..... What a weekend things have definitely become a realization and not one I like...